ELVIS MELLON ORIGINS # 2  ICE STATION SOMMO

A QUINN MARTIAN PRODUCTION

COPYRIGHT 2005/2011

PART #  9

Location: Hexarus Triune star system-Ice Station Sommo-orbiting Triune # two-  Southern
section of central Dome # 2- Recreation Hall-Bar.

First cohort Zlaarissh of the Draco star empire was beginning to think that Elvis Mellon was
truly insane.
He sat at the rec room bar next to the crazy human,  just   starring at him in stunned
silence,   his massive jaw dropping to reveal a frightening set of crocodile like teeth. His large
yellow orbed eyes trying to get a read on the human’s expression as Elvis grinned amiably
after having just told Zlaarissh and his fellow humans that he planned on feigning
surrender and letting Zlaarissh escort him and some of his crew onto the Decimator to face
Zor and about fifteen hundred Draco Decimator personnel that were armed to the teeth.    
The entire rec hall fell silent except for the sound of the Juke box playing Nancy Sinatra’s
“These Boots were made for walking,”   and ironically  it was Zlaarissh who had selected it
when he and his men were given a quick tour of the rec hall before getting down to business.

The other Draco dared not question Zlaarissh’s actions or his seeming familiarity with
The machine/device or its “songs,” and Elvis and his companions had all exchanged looks of
surprise and a few raised eyebrows but no one had said anything. Zlaarissh had simply
stated that he just randomly picked a button but he had not even pretended to show
distaste or irritation as his subordinates had when the music came on. Now it was the only
sound in the room after Elvis dropped his “bombshell,” that and the rumbling of Gronds
stomach.
Zlaarissh regained his composure and said.” WHAT???? Are you telling me you ARE
surrendering?!  Am I missing something here? OR are you earth humans really as insane
and irrational as you’re rumored to be!”   

Colonel T.P Sommo, who sat to the right of Zlaarissh, leaned towards him to get Elvis’s
attention, speaking to them both as the Doc simply looked on in his usual vacuum of
silence. “I never thought I would be sitting here at my own bar with a god dammed Draco
having a drink, least of all one that’s been sent    to kill or capture me AND  I  certainly  
never thought I  would be agreeing with him on anything, but like he said…… WHAT????”
ARE you out of your F*&%ING MIND????  We got to get down to Triune # two with your freak
show spiders and …..  (  Loud   objections of  “HEY  WATCH  IT!!!”  From both spiders   )    ….
SORRY…force of habit!!  Uhh….your  PALS those NICE  cuddly  spiders……and  my Sgt  so  
we can inflict them on those god dammed  mutated  monsters  these  (  gesturing to
Zlaarissh  )  cold blooded  assholes  have created !!!!”  Zlaarissh’s pupils shrunk to even
thinner slits and the Colonel could feel his hot breath on his neck as Zlaarissh growled a
low guttural growl that the other Draco picked up and imitated until the spiders moved
closer to them with their deadly front claws raised up as if to decapitate all of them.  

Elvis whistled for Beer Two to roll over to him and top off his drink as he moved from his
perpetual hunched over ,  elbows on the bar position to turning on his bar stool so his back
was to it  and he had the backs of his elbows leaning on the bar  to face all those seated at
the tables, including his own crew and the Colonels men and their “guests.” He lowered his
glass as the bot produced a small spigot from it head that dispensed brown liquid into it   as
the little bot beeped and whistled. The large man inspected the glass for a minute then
tapped the bot like one would pet a dog as he took a deep draught of it as though he had
just crawled in from the Sahara desert and once again he had the room’s full attention. He
glanced at the  large Draco sitting next to him, taking  his sun glasses off he  placed them
on the bar and pushed up the brim of his fedora so everyone could see his eyes.

“We got Triune # two covered Colonel, don’t worry your pretty little head about it! (Turning to
face the table where the cat was sitting)  Smoky, when you get a chance, SHOW the Colonel
here what’s going down with the deal we brokered with the Mantis and share it with Sgt
Sssszzivicck too.  Now to the matter at hand! O.K, LIKE I was saying, our illustrious guest’s
were just a scant  ten minutes ago  OUR  invading enemies and trying to kill some of us real
dead and capture some of us, and  most  likely -  ME,  if that’s not being to vain and self
centered and most likely the Colonel and  Doc Sax , for REVENGE sake  (turning to the Doc
and smiling and raising his glass to him)   and  not to repeat myself but as an added bonus,
and one not originally planned by  Zor and who ever else in the Draco planning department
came up with his or their  hair brained scheme and recruited   the now very DEAD  and
reduced to ashes-   hybrid spy son  of a bitch  (  turning to Veracose Primm and raising his
glass to her  )
And we can bet Professor Krophf would be on the list  or agenda for capturing   and  the
only  fly  in that  ointment of  that  plan, or in this case, FLIES in - said ointment of  a  plan  
, er   should I say  two very big F&%$ing spiders and  a big F*&^ing  insect, and a  beautiful  
one at that  (  now turning to the giant white Mantis Sgt and raising his glass to her )  was  
not only  the aforementioned  BIG critters….BUT of course, my old  pal Virgil….far  more
then JUST some ships computer, but a highly evolved sentient A.I  super being be in  its,
his/her whatever’s  OWN  right….and  HERE WE ARE, You  guys (  now turning to the Draco
and Gray cyborg clones sitting at the near by tables facing him  and raising his drink to
them  all  )  ARE our prisoners BUT you could be   our guests, cause I  have a proposition for  
you all  (  turning back to Zlaarissh  -who  was  not taking his eyes off the big  human…)

Zor –AND speaking  of insane, crazy sons of bitches….expects   either Smegma, or  You, Mr.
Zlaarissh, or all of you, however unlikely, to come back to  his super dreadnought flag ship,
the Decimator, aboard your stolen  C.G  Lyran  cargo shuttle, with  us ( chuckling )  as  
captives, SO  I SAY, WE  GIVE HIM what  he wants!! ….he pulled a Trojan Horse  on  us, well  
now we pull one on HIM,  Zlaarissh here and  YOUR men  get to bring us as your seeming
prisoners aboard the Lyran cargo shuttle and back to the Decimator,  they will  be getting
more then  they bargained for with  our buddy Zik  here and the good professor and Miss
Primm, er Doctor Primm, excuse me Maam, and  we TAKE OVER THEIR GOD DAMMED  
Flag ship and ram it right up  Zor and the emperors ASS!!!!
BUT if you help us, Mr. Draco , sir (turning to look Zlaarissh in the eyes) we will let you guys
go, safe and sound, no harm, no foul.”  Before Zlaarissh could answer several things
happened at once; Zlaarissh’s sub commander- Zleeerothh, was shaking his head negatively
and starting to get up from his seat, shouting at his superior to the effect of. “NO, WE will
not betray our leaders, don’t do it sir!!” Colonel T.P Sommo was up off his bar stool and
turning five shades of red screaming. “LET THESE SONS OF BITCHES GO?  HAVE YOU
LOST YOUR GOD DAMMED MIND??”

Professor Krophf was out of his seat and on his feet too with the brief case still hand cuffed
to his wrist, shouting at Elvis. “Don’t I have a say in this? You think I am waltzing onto and
into the Flag ship of the Draco seventh fleet-   Zor’s command ship?? One of the biggest and
deadliest super dreadnaughts the Draco ever built??” Veracose Primm was also out of her
chair, but she was smiling and cheering, holding her fist up and shouting.  “YEAH, LETS
GO, I’m game!!!”    Even the gray cyborg clones were agitated and squirming in their seats,
Zik and his brother Zek were now on either side of the grays table with their claws
threateningly extended as several of the Colonel’s men aimed blaster rifles their way and
towards the Draco. Elvis got up off his bar stool and looked none too happy about it. “SHUT
UP!!!!!!!  ENOUGH ALREADY!!  (Gesturing to the Gray cyborg clones)  HAS anyone ever
asked THEIR opinion?” Elvis sauntered over to the Grays and pulled up a chair from another
table and turning it back side towards the table, sat   facing them with a hand on the chairs
back and resting his scotch glass on the table. “Hey fella’s, you guys have been awfully quiet
during all this, what would you like to do? Would you like to help Ol Elvis out and get your
freedom? No more slavery, no more working for the lizards, I bet these (gesturing to the
Draco) reptiles never asked your opinion or gave you a choice! So what say YOU?

You and your bosses here help us get onto the Decimator and scuttle it and give Zor the ass
kicking he deserves and I will make sure you guys get your freedom and sanctuary in the
Galactic Confederation. No prison camps, no slave labor, a new life. Free to do what you
want. (Turning TO FACE Zlaarissh again)  And you Draco, we can make it look like we got
away from you when we got aboard Decimator and you can all get aboard a life pod before
we take the ship.”  Gray cyborg clone –Drone 113B  was the sort of unofficial spokesman for
the five remaining cyborg clones, due in part to his being several days older then his test
tube “mates” and with their natural telepathy augmented with Draco technology cybernetic
implants , his mind was the strongest and most vocal.

No one had ever asked him or his kind what they thought or had given them a choice. There
were factions of Grays both from Orion and Zeta Reticulli that had staid free of the yoke the
Draco had imposed upon them when they conquered and enslaved many of Grays various
sub species  and started breeding and cloning them at facilities like Reptilicon # 6-113, but
only a fraction of those Grays were friendly with the confederation.

Most were just as insidious as the Draco and had very negative agendas. Drone 113B did not
care about any of this, not politics or issues of morality or values, not war or power or
control. He just wanted what he had glimpsed from afar when he and his fellow cyborg
clones helped the Draco attack, invade, raid, and sometimes destroy- countless worlds along
the C.G outlands and frontiers and non C.G worlds too.  He saw beings of every description;  
humanoid, insectoid, amphibian, energy beings, aquatic beings, methane breathers, silica
based, ammonia breathers, non breathers, etc, all living individual,  FREE lives doing what
they wanted, having off spring, having mates, some kind of career or purpose other then
serving Draco masters and killing for a living and actually  having LIVES!!
He seldom had time to question his existence as a slave/Drone/fighter but now this human
was giving him a choice, and HE LIKED IT!! His fellow drones heard and saw and felt all his
thoughts, the Draco tried to suppress emotions and 98% of Gray’s did not have emotions or
a sense of individuality but Drone 113B and his squad were controlled by first cohort
Zlaarissh who could send them battle commands and keep them in check through a chip
implanted in his head and theirs and his strong sense of individuality and his emotions had
bleed through to 113B and the others and Zlaarissh was not your typical Draco by any  
means but a man of principles and honor.

Zlaarissh had most definitely imprinted 113B and the others with a sense of decency and
decorum and   a unique and rugged sense of individualism  and not only  that; After  years
of ingesting nothing but that horrible nutrient gruel via a test tube, Elvis Mellon’s fabulous
and incredible  A.I holo being had with in a matter of seconds reconfigured the Gray cyborg
clones digestive systems to be able to handle solids and none of that absorbing nutrients
through their skin  like other sub species of Grays, and 113B –courtesy of the rec room’s
replicator’s had just had his first corn dog, side order of chili cheese fries, two hot dogs with
the works, and on Elvis’s suggestion; a chocolate shake with a splash of Jim Beam  and
topped off with a shot of 190 proof  “moonshine,”  and 113B  KNEW  in that heavenly  
moment as he ate the last fry , licked the plate clean and downed the last of the shake that  
there was no going back to working for the Draco,  in short-    Both Zlaarissh and Drone
113B spoke at the same time.

“YES, we will help you.” There was immediate grumblings among the Draco soldiers as well
as Ice Station Sommo personnel. Elvis Mellon lifted his large frame off the chair and held his
right hand up, stomping his foot several times like a horse trying to count. “QUIET!!!
(Turning to the still standing and annoyed Professor Krophf)  Professor, have I ever steered
you wrong? RELAX!! I promise nothing will happen to you or Voltaire! We got Virgil to
protect your collective asses and we need your expertise on Draco technology (turning to
Primm) and yours as well Doctor Primm, between you two and Voltaire, I am sure we can
over ride their systems and commandeer the ship.”
Zlaarissh could not contain himself any longer and stood up from his bar stool, his long
reptilian tail thrashing behind him as the Colonels men made sure he saw their blasters
pointed at his head. “I saw what your incredible computer being did back in the corridor
with the bodies and cleaning everything up instantaneously! WHY do you even need us?
Why cant you just make it control the ship from here and be done with it, why not just blink
us and the bloody cockroaches and Lubricators out of existence be done with it all? You
could rule the universe with that power!!  WHY DON’T YOU? And another thing; even if you
make it look like you got the better of us and escaped, DO you think Zor will let that go? He
will execute us right on the spot!! You had better do better then that! I am supposed to be
retiring soon with a pension!!!”      

Elvis placed his scotch glass on the table near Drone 113B and hung his thumbs in his belt
loops at his hips. “It’s complicated Zlaar.  I don’t have time to go into the political and ethical
workings of the Cybernetic children of the Ascendant but Virgil is not so much  my  ships
computer AS it/he/she IS my ship AND not really  mine at all but sort of my  guide and
mentor on  loan  and you just have to try and trust me on this, “HE” will protect us and
prevent us from getting croaked, with in reason…but I cannot use that  incredible
technology to go around obliterating everyone or conquering or destroying, THERES Rules
and  protocols , and we fill figure something out to make sure you don’t get executed.

I know you have no reason to actually trust me but from your JUKE BOX musical selection I
think we have more in common then meets the eye and something tells me you’re not a big
fan of Zor’s so let’s build on that. MEANWHILE I say we beam Zek (motioning to Zik’s brother
the blue tinged spider) down to Triune # two to help with the Yarn situation if Zek has no
objections?  Zek shook his massive head and said. “This was supposed to be a vacation for
me!!! ZIK, Told me this WAS JUST A PLEASURE CRUISE to raise some Hell and blow off
some steam!!”  Elvis threw back his head and laughed. “WELL?  Aint we had fun so far?”  
The giant spider gave its version of a shrug with its four front legs. “O.K., just throw me some
hazard pay when this is over.”  Elvis picked up his shades and put them back on, pointing
his finger at the huge spider. “Done, now I suggest that Smoky and Voltaire remain here at
the station with the remainder of the Colonel’s personnel and the rest of you, including Sgt.
Sssszzivicck accompany me and our “frienemies” here aboard the Pulsar Nine, Now LETS
ROLL!”          


Location:  The Planet Triune # two -also known as “Larry” – the equatorial plains- front battle
lines of Draco alliance/Galactic Confederation conflict.
General Malaize and Major Salmonella of the super mutant giant cockroaches were running
for their lives through the collapsing trenches in the Draco alliance side of the front battle
lines “wastelands.”  The general and his aide were frantically crawling over the dead and
dying corpses and soon to be dead Draco, Super mutant cockroaches, Gray cyborg clones,
broken and smashed Lubricators that oozed gear and motor oil everywhere making it very
difficult to get a grip on things. General Malaize was cursing to himself and ducking as
swarms of huge white Mantis’s buzzed overhead like Apache Helicopters, some landing on
Draco alliance troops and viciously ripping them apart and eating them, decapitating them
first and eating their heads.
The day had started off so well with the Confederation on the run and losing terribly to the
onslaught of the Yarns and their Draco riders and support troops.  Malaize and the Major
had been aboard the Decimator for a demonstration of the Draco’s new bio weapons,  the
mutated and genetic  hybrid Yarmaw’s known as Yarns and  Zor and his Brainiac scientist
had assured everyone this was a sure thing and a fool proof plan!!  Between the Yarn’s and
the Draco’s pulse weapons that they had kept under wraps until today, the C.G troops and
their armored divisions and tactical air support had not stood a chance.

Malaize had watched in delight as the Draco alliance assault spearheaded by these new
wonder bio weapon mutants had broken through C.G defenses and  cut through their
troops like a knife through butter, and it looked like total victory was in their grasp until the
pulse weapons suddenly failed and the confederations powerless weapons, tanks,
atmospheric assault craft, etc, had all roared back to life and  wave after wave of  Mantis
carriers had arrived with armadas of transports, all loaded with swarming Mantis’s out for
blood. General  Malaize signaled the Major to follow his lead and burrow under a pile of
corpses to hide from the hordes of voracious Mantis that  were now being led by a huge blue
tinged  crystalline spider that had just beamed down  out of no where.  Malaize had only
ever seen one of these legendary and fabled spiders in person and that was the one aboard
Elvis Mellon’s old ship the Delapidator  and this was not him, but he was willing to bet
dollars to donuts that Elvis had sent him. The spider was as big as any cockroach and it had
done more damage in a matter of minutes then even the Mantis’s had done in the half hour
they had been on this miserable rock!

Both Malaize and Major Salmonella were speechless as they saw this spider tearing through
packs of Yarns like they were made of paper, chopping them up, decapitating them and
their Draco riders, The Mantis swarms had now rallied to the spider and they followed along
behind him with legions of Plaedian and Lyran special forces, Sirian and Andromedian
ground troops, Vash, Murdoccks, etc, pouring in to the Draco alliance side. After the
mornings stunning victory the Mantis had made quick work of the packs of Yarns and   the
tables had been turned and the spider was the icing on the proverbial cake. The Draco and
their allies had been in full retreat when the latest reports came in that Mantis transports
were landing with C.G back up on Triune # one and three as well. Malaize knew this latest
development had Elvis Mellon written all over it, he did not know how, but he JUST knew
and he also wanted to ring Zor’s neck. First chance the general got, he and the major were
hopping on the first shuttle up to Decimator.
Malaize heard a cockroach foot soldier behind him yell. “General, LOOK!!” Just as the sonic
boom of Draco assault transports and fighters broke the atmosphere and drowned out the
sound of explosions, screams and weapons fire. Malaize looked up as wave after wave of
short range assault fighters flown by Gray cyborg clones came screaming over his head,
engaging the swarms of Mantis in a dog fight to rival anything the cockroach general had
ever seen. Draco troop transports were landing right in the middle of the wastelands as more
of Zor’s shock troops came pouring out to engage the enemy. Malaize turned to his
subordinate as they both crawled out from under putrid corpses to look upon the raging
battle. “Perhaps we might win this thing after all, but I still want to speak with Zor so let’s
find that shuttle.”   

Location:  Bridge of the Draco flag ship super dreadnaught “Decimator.” - In High orbit of
Triune # two.

Zor was not a happy camper. He sat brooding and fuming in his command chair as the
janitors and cleanup crew dragged out the dismembered body parts of the latest bridge crew
and mopped up the blood. The “new” bridge crew cautiously took their assigned stations as
they became available and free of gore, blood and remains , some sneaking a quick glance at
the perpetrator of this act, High commander Zor, eyeing the bloody scimitar that still lay a
cross his leather and armor clad knees. Zor had just gotten word that several armadas of
Mantis carriers had dropped out of hyperspace and into   orbit of all three planets and had
deposited transports down planet side with swarms of Mantis troops decimating the Yarns
and Draco alliance battalions by the score  and some “unforeseen” force had rendered the
pulse weapons useless. To add insult to injury he had been informed that Hemroidicus
Buurrnzz and his science vessel was half way to Reptilicon # 6 -113 so Zor would have to
take his wrath out on something more immediate and that had been the now very dead
bridge crew. Fleet admiral Zaarrgh and General Zleerg had returned to the bridge after
changing their blood soaked uniforms. They had been spared from Zor’s murderous rage by
the simple fact that he needed them to help win this conflict and they did not dare transfer
out or seek early retirement THAT was NOT an option with Zor.

Zaarrgh shot Zleerg a quick look that Zleerg took to mean-   “HOLY SHIT!”  -As the last
mutilated corpse was dragged off the bridge in a body bag. The smell of chemical cleaners
and bleach hung in the air as Zor chased the janitor cleaning crew off of his bridge.
“ENOUGH!! Get OUT!! Leave a little blood as a reminder to the new crew to watch their
step!”  (Turning to his top brass)  “Zaarrgh, any word from our hybrid spy, Smegma, on the
status of the Ice station Sommo mission?”  Zaarrgh loosened the top button of his uniform
and nervously met Zor’s gaze. “No, Commander, nothing yet.”  Zor absently fidgeted with the
sword in his lap and then turned to his top general. “Zleerg, are our reinforcements having
any better luck killing off those dammed flying insectoid Mantis???”

Zleerg looked down at his polished boots. “It is too soon to tell sir, that spider is wreaking
havoc down there.” Zor shot out of chair and stood glaring at his general. “SPIDER??? WHAT
SPIDER???”  Zleerg stammered. “I, I thought you knew about it High commander, Th, the
crystalline spider, one of the ones from Arachnidonazarathain, he suddenly appeared down
there with the Mantis’s and he’s been leading the C.G counter assault, its impervious to our
weapons and unstoppable, its like  lethal juggernaut! ”  Zor got that mad gleam in his eyes
again and there was a collective gulp from the bridge crew.
“WHAT would one of those spiders be doing there? They have never bothered us; they don’t
even have many dealings with the confederation...WAIT!!  That dammed Elvis Mellon has one
in his crew!!!!  HE MUST have sent him there!!!  If that thing just showed up, THAT means
they have NOT captured or killed that overweight, decadent talking monkey yet!!  General
lets see if this “THING,” THIS SPIDER, is impervious to NUKES!!  Launch some warheads at
that dam thing and let’s see if it glows!”

Admiral Zaarrgh would have broken out in a cold sweat if reptiles could sweat. “But
commander, if we launch nukes we will kill everything on the planet!! We have close to half
a million ground troops down there plus our allies, all that equipment, the mining
operations, the surviving ecosystem and not to mention the C.G troops!!  The emperor
specifically said, NO NUKES!!”    Zor barred his huge fanged teeth and his yellow orbed eyes
grew wider, the slits of his reptilian pupils narrowing as blood vessels   
Became pronounced; Zaarrgh knew this look all too well and backed up several steps as Zor
raged. “I don’t give a monkeys ASS what my FATHER the emperor SAID!!  And SCREW the
Bloody ecosystem and the CONFEDERATION!!!! AND As far as our troops go?  

THEY are expendable!!!!  They will be martyrs to a great cause!!!  The mines are deep
enough that the ores and resources should not be too radiated!!!  I want that Frigging
SPIDER AND THOSE BLOODY FLYING BUGS DEAD!!  SQUASHED!!!  IF NUKES DON’T
WORK THEN USE NEUTRON BOMBS!!!!!!!!”  Just then the communications officer’s comlink
started blinking and the diminutive Draco female cleared her throat to get Zor’s attention.
Zor gave her a guttural growl and waved his clawed hand. “SPEAK!!!”  “Sir, I have First cohort
Zlaarissh calling on a secure encoded channel from the stolen C.G Lyran cargo shuttle; He
says they have captured Elvis Mellon, Colonel T.P Sommo and other members of his crew,
including Doctor Sax and they are en route to us as we speak.”   
You could cut the tension on the bridge with a chainsaw and all the bridge personnel
including the two high ranking military leaders held their breath waiting for Zor’s reaction.
Zor visibly relaxed and sat back down in his command chair and laughed a rasping, insane
sounding cackle. “WELL, AT least SOMETHING is going right today!!  (Turning to his two
subordinates)  THERE, you see? Zlaarissh came through!! We will wait till that bloated
disgrace to mammals and the other monkeys are aboard and in chains at my feet before we
launch the nukes. I want Elvis Mellon to witness the defeat of the confederation before we
execute him !!”  TO BE CONTINUED....
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